The Strategic Role of Flattery and Compliments in Influencing
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Influencing is a complex terrain where strategies and tactics are carefully employed to secure favorable outcomes. Among these strategies, the use of flattery and compliments stands out as a subtle yet powerful tool. It serves as a deliberate means to achieve specific objectives, rooted in the psychology of human interactions. The research on flattery can be summarized in a few words: we are more influenced by flattery than we may want to admit!
Let me highlight three areas that are impacted by flattery and compliments.
Influencing When Building Rapport:
The negotiation process often spans extended periods, and successful negotiations are frequently built upon strong relationships. Compliments and flattery can be instrumental in creating and nurturing positive rapport between negotiating parties. By acknowledging and appreciating each other’s qualities, negotiators can foster a friendly and agreeable atmosphere. This rapport goes beyond mere pleasantries; it creates a foundation for smoother and more enjoyable negotiations. A warm atmosphere can help navigate through contentious issues with greater ease and, sometimes, even transform adversaries into allies. In addition, influencing by offering genuine praise or admiration, negotiators can create an environment where both parties feel at ease. When we receive sincere compliments, we tend to lower our guard and we are more likely to share information openly, fostering transparency and cooperation.
Influencing to Boosting Confidence:
Complimenting someone’s abilities or achievements can significantly boost their self-esteem and confidence. This boost can be a tactical advantage. When you want the other party to be more receptive to your proposals or to take calculated risks, recognizing and complimenting their skills or accomplishments can be a persuasive force. It encourages them to step out of their comfort zones and consider possibilities they might have otherwise dismissed.
Influence by Creating Reciprocity:
The principle of reciprocity is a fundamental aspect of human behavior. When someone receives a favor, they tend to feel a natural inclination to reciprocate. The art of influencing by complimenting and flattering can be seen as planting the seeds of reciprocity. When you genuinely acknowledge the other party’s strengths or contributions, you create a sense of obligation in them. This feeling of indebtedness can make them more willing to accommodate your requests, consider your perspective, or make concessions when needed.